5/31/17

Trump Speaks Samoan? ...Or Trying?

The Internet and twittersphere today have been swamped, flooded and inundated with responses, jokes and interpretations of a word in one of president Trump’s latest and iffy tweets. Which one?  This one:“Despite the constant negative press covfefe. Yes every average English writer/speaker has held his/her breath at the new, if not strange, word - “covfefe”.  Comedians and late night show hosts are having a feeding frenzy with the “typo” (for a lack of a better word, or maybe I can use “covfefe” lol!!).  It's not even a standard coinage 😩. Jimmy Kimmel, one of my favorites, tweeted “What makes me saddest is that I know I’ll never write anything funnier than #covfefe.”

Mr. Trump then sarcastically tweeted several hours later (about 6 am):
“Who can figure out the true meaning of "covfefe" ??? Enjoy!”

Well, president, here’s my take.

To a Samoan native speaker, covfefe seems intelligible especially with the “fefe” part.  The two possible English pronunciations “fay-fay” (fefe) and “fee-fee” (fifi) are both legit Samoan words.  The former means “afraid/scared/fear” and the latter is Samoan for “small intestine” (not “small hands” ..lol!).  And so not surprisingly, Google concurs; it automatically detects “covfefe” to be Samoan.

According to the Independent (UK) website, “Google Translate actually suggests that the word is Samoan, if you use its "detect language" feature. But it can't translate it.”  

Actually, I think I can translate it.... read on ...lol!

Now, like many other word prognosticators out there, let me expound and/or parody the Samoan connection - namely the “afraid/scared/fear” (fefe) translation. The best and closest Samoan translation for Mr. Trump’s asinine and goofy lexical construct is “kafēfē” which is a word of exclamation and literally means “Oh my!”  Grammatically, therefore, “covfefe” can be an interjection, much like “kafefe!”.  The Samoan transliteration is fitting whether phonetically, semantically or contextually.  Consider therefore this version of the tweet: “Despite the constant negative press, kafēfē! (oh my!)”

Kafēfē also is an utterance that expresses one’s fear of a specific something. (The chief of vainglory (cov) is fefe; hence covfefe.)  In Mr.Trump’s case he either feared the press for perpetrating fake news, OR he was just being afraid and scared because of the time of night.  Yes, it was around midnight that he tweeted!  Midnight!!  Can you believe that?  (By the way, I want my president, especially for an old man like him, to be asleep around that time, for the sake of the country, pleaaase Mr. Please!!)  So he must have said: “Kafēfē, ua vaeluapo a’o lea lava e fai la’u tuiti!” (Oh my, it’s midnight and I’m still tweeting!).  And that’s what happens as a result when an old man is up at midnight tweeting; he tweets nonsensical things.  Koeikiiki tweet se upusa (Soon, he may tweet some profanity) Come to think of it, he may already have.  Covfefe, in Plutonian or Martian parlance, could very well be a vulgar word. LOL!

Thus far in Mr. Trump’s fledgling presidency, nothing with regards to audacity, impudence, vulgarity and insolence should surprise us anymore.  Some have already said that his presidency is a joke, and with tweets like this “covfefe” one, it only validates it even more.

So with that in mind, let’s not take Mr. Trump’s presidency seriously; let’s just treat it as a comic relief in the ongoing White House drama series.  We’re about due for another one; the last ones being  of the Nixon and Clinton years. No pun intended, Kafēfē! ... Hahahaaaaaaaaaaa! Ia Kofafa loa! (Bye for now!). Ia pe kofifi fo'i 🤣😂

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